HeartBeat

My son had one request on the grocery list this week, Cheerios. When I navigated to the cereal aisle and found the Cheerios section, I had to take 3 steps back to take in the full panoramic view of all the options. I looked like a squirrel trying to cross the street. Did you know there are at least 16 flavors of Cheerios? His untimely response to my text put me in the position to make the decision for him, I didn't want to be wrong. To be honest, I almost just grabbed a box of Apple Jacks and called it good. The unanticipated choice overload was far too stimulating. From the simplest things of choosing the right cereal to choosing the right career path, I can be crippled by data overload. Analysis paralysis is caused by overthinking. The brain is constantly running and creating an immense feeling of overwhelm. The fabrication of "what-if" scenarios sucks me into this vortex. It elevates pressure and fear of not making the right decision. There is a plethora of ava...

I often begin my day with a personalized coffee mug. What do you think? Would I rather drink my morning coffee from a cup inscribed Seize the Day, #blessed, or one written with You Can't Fix Stupid? Words have the power to elevate or devastate. Neutral is non-existent. I can undoubtedly recount times when I was highly complimented as well as deeply wounded by someone's words. I am guilty of it too. Even unintentionally, as I may rush to get my point across. After all, these are the days of multitasking, deadlines, and dehumanizing. Let's face it, some people do just like to hear the sound of their own voice. It makes them feel good about themselves. In my opinion, there may be a time and a place for sarcastic or cynical conversations with close friends or old college buddies. Or maybe when I am speaking to a confidant to vent about some negative situation. In my experience, when others see no value in talking to me, there will likely be a rift in the relationship. I w...

I recently read Dee Dauphinee’s book, When You Find My Body , a memoir of the search for lost Appalachian Trail through hiker, Geraldine Largay. I listened to the audiobook three times, which is read with a pace and the sense of urgency the situation called for. I then read the hardcopy cover to cover, pondering over the epigraphs which emphatically introduce each chapter. As an avid, elite hiker, filled with wanderlust, this story struck a deep chord. I had Google Alerts set up for Gerry Largay so that I would not miss a whisper of hope. It was the summer of 2013. I had just hiked Mount Abraham. I squeezed it in between the torrential rains flooding us that month. I proudly checked it off my list of New England’s Highest Summits. I recounted the Reddington hike. The only way to Reddington is via a bushwack. It is always a pleasant surprise when making it back to your vehicle at the trailhead. The woods swallow you whole. The forest seems to get thicker every year above the 45th ...

Beautiful, magnificent Eagle Lake - where friends are family. The Cannan Compound - a place where things were simpler and carefree. Where I learned to fish, swim, waterski, run, backcountry ski, and bushwhack. Where I lost my first tooth, had my first kiss, and survived my first heartbreak. Where the beautiful things and the hard things happened. So many memories and so many mixed emotions that surface. I am not the same person as I was in junior high, high school, or college. It is surreal - like I stepped into the memories of another person. My concept of home has changed and continues to shift. Travel will do that. Travel is transformative. It is why we may feel sad upon returning from a destination vacation or an adventure. We've tried new things; we have an altered mindset. So here's the thing, this place where I use to feel safe and secure, I now feel lost and lonely. At one point along the way, I realized that the home I grew up in is really not my home anymore. M...