Old Habits Die Hard



We don't know how much will miss our habits and addictions until they are gone, like an old friend. We are creatures of habit, and we gravitate towards the comfort of our patterns. And we validate our learned behavior from role models who were not always making the best decisions.

Breaking a habit is very complicated. Brain research shows us that the worn pathways of our routines can be remapped, but it will not be easy. And after the age of 25, it becomes even harder to break a bad habit. Most addictions form not only as a means to avoid discomfort, but also to gain pleasure. When we seek to break a bad habit, we can expect much anguish. And with the most subtle instigation, bad habits can be reignited. You can go a year in abstinence, and then give in one time and the practice comes right back and sweeps you away like a riptide.

The antidote to break a bad habit is to form a new parallel pattern of behavior. Habits are easier to make than they are to break. For example, if you are really stressed and reach for that bag of Lays Classic potato chips, go for a 20-minute walk instead. Furthermore, do not keep the chips in the house. Or replace them with banana chips. Our brains run on autopilot, taking the path of least resistance. The brain wants to be lazy. So, know your triggers and set yourself up for success.

If you repeat a behavior often enough, it will settle in. Based on an empirical study, it is suggested that it takes 21 days to formulate a new habit. Empirical, being that of an individual's experience vs. a controlled clinical study. The brain research on neuroplasticity pinpoints just how malleable our brains really are. Think of your neural pathways as hiking trails. Every time a hiker trods over the path, it is packed down and eroded. Granted there are many herd paths in the high Colorado Rocky Mountains, the main trail to the summit is still very evident. So by repeating a new behavior or habit, we are creating new neural pathways. And that will take time.

So here's the thing, changing a habit is never that simple. If it were, we would all be in fantastic shape, alcoholics would never relapse, and everyone would be up at the crack of dawn for a healthy breakfast and invigorating workout. When we develop healthier habits, over time as they become ingrained, they help to erode the craving for our bad habits. New habits become second nature to us. The longing for a new practice keeps the focus and is the basis of change. Change begins with conscious learning and an emotionally charged, repetitive action.

Exercise: Choose one habit to break and replace with a new habit. 
  1. Be sure you really want to break your habit. Attach an emotion to your intention. When emotions get involved, it becomes meaningful. The limbic system is in charge of your feelings. 
  2. Exercise your brain. Our brain, the cerebellum, does not like change. It is lazy and will take the path of least resistance. It's why we keep making the same resolutions. Find energy intensive challenges. Learn a new language or a musical instrument. By doing so, you will activate the neo-cortex.
  3. Identify and predict your triggers. Visualize how you will overcome. Sometimes triggers are emotional, so tap into the limbic system. We have a thought, we act in response, experience, the emotion attached to that memory. One of the best ways to tap the limbic system is through smell, aromatherapy.  
  4. Repeat your new habit as often as you can. Consistently. 
  5. Expect it to be challenging. Review the earlier blog,  Motivation.
  6. Don't beat yourself up when you cave. And reward yourself for your small successes.
  7. Reach out to an accountability partner. 
Ponder this:
How bad do you want it?
How will you feel when you overcome and are successful?
Are you doing this for you, or is this pressure from another person?

My Life's Lesson: Dwelling on changing the past, the old, is unproductive. Focus your energy on building the new. That is what moves life forward. 

From the sweetest spot in my heart to yours, may you create new patterns of your heart's desire.
~Audrey xo

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