It Is What It Is

Perception and reality are two different things. We often confuse perception with reality. Metaphorically speaking, a lighthouse is a beacon. It's something people who are lost can look towards for guidance to certainty.

It has often been said that your perception is your reality. At a very early age, our brains begin to identify complex patterns of behavior and ingrain our mode of thinking. In these instances, we very quickly formulate a hypothesis and create our perceptions. So here's the thing, once we develop an opinion, the brain works hard at confirming it as a reality. The brain has an ego. It never wants to be wrong and searches for data to validate its predetermined perception, regardless of whether it is, in fact, legitimate data. Undisputed, this perception eventually declares a firm reality. In short, perception equates to the sum of our past conditioning.

Google has made information very accessible. We can search for information to back any opinion and cement our perceptions and create a false reality. Depends on what side of the issue you are on and what data you are looking for. Any counterclaim can usurp the power of truth. And therefore, there is grave difficulty dismissing false perceptions.

It is my opinion that most people are quick to jump to conclusions and pass judgment before giving others the benefit of the doubt, hence falling victim to the perception curse. On most occasions, they reference formed memories to construct inaccurate assessments of a situation or person. It soon becomes a way to justify their actions.

Let's face it, we do mistake things and create inaccurate convictions. Our thoughts and feelings seem real to us, so we conclude that they must be true. We often don’t realize how our perceptions eclipse reality. They look like one and the same. Look at it this way, perception is the lens through which we observe reality. However, the lens often gets clouded.

Reality is the true state of things, it is neutral. In essence, it is how things really are. “When truth is blurred by lies and misinformation, perception becomes a reality, and all is lost.” Our perception of reality will always be based on what we hear, see and think. Most of the time we cannot control what happens, but we can still control our reactions. We need to make conscious choices to let go of thoughts that are not true and all too often hold us back. We must actively seek information to realign with reality.

Exercise: A Call to Action

1. Think about an issue or problem that you’d like to resolve.
2. List possible misinformation, misrepresentations, and untruths. 
3. List all the possible ways in which you are contributing to the problem even if it does not seem accurate to you.
4. Ask yourself, “What else could be going on underneath the surface which I’m unaware of?”
5. Ask a few friends to give you their honest opinion on ways you may be perpetuating the problem. 
6. Find commonalities among your findings and your friend's findings.
7. Redefine the problem and choose some possible solutions with actionable steps.

• Does this untangle perception from reality? 
• Did you engage in an alternative way of thinking?
• Are you struggling with being right? 
• Are you quick to jump to conclusions? 

I am not saying this will be easy. I spent the week focusing on my perception of an issue, concluding where I went wrong. I took some terrible advice. I have stopped beating myself up over it. What is done is done. Going back is not an option. I am going to pick up the pieces, do my best, speak the truth, make amends and move forward. Period. It is what it is. It's alright now. I learned my lesson well.

My Life's Lesson: I am not always right, nor do I feel the need to dig my heels in and be right. There is always more than meets the eye. Perception is undoubtedly reality unless you take the initiative to change it. 

From the sweetest spot in my heart to yours, may your inner light shine. 
~Audrey